Day 6 - Anxious time

”The challenge of today's exercise is to isolate a moment when you're feeling anxious and use it as feedback for the way you experience time and life in those moments. The more awareness you can bring to this experience, the better you'll get at moving out of that feeling and, later on, the better you'll be at avoiding the reactions that lead to that state in the first place.”


Almost everyone on my mothers side of the family have had some kind of anxiety, but it wasn't until I experienced it myself that I would understand how overwhelming it can be. Prior to my breakdown in 2004 I had episodes where I suddenly felt claustrophobic when riding in a buss and just had to get out and get some air. Those times gave me some long walks home :/
It all seemed to be triggered when I was mostly stressed, no matter if it was workwise or personal stuff. It could be a smell I couldn't cope with or load music maybe.

Now, anxiety in it self is the fear of being afraid. But the hard part is if you can not pinpoint what it is you are afraid of. But that's okay, cause there are techniques that you can learn so you can cope when the situation occurs. There are so many good therapists today and if you can afford that, that is a great help. But be sure to find someone who will help you address the issue and help you work with yourself. Unfortunatly there's a lot of therapists that will place the blame on a parent etc. and you can go see that therapist for several years and not dealing with the feelings of what gives you the anxiety. I learned a couple of useful tools this way, but I have learned the most by reading a lot of stuff.....books, articles, blogs etc. I quickly take notis of things that resonates with me and dig deeper into that. I have learned that listening to my heart tells me that it is the right time to deal with it. Things that don't resonate with me, I say, okay I'm not there yet, and move on. Funny thing is, that maybe 6 months later, that same thing you discarded shows up again in something new you are reading and this time it resonates. And there, it's time to do something about it. This is how it works for me anyway … lol

So talking about your anxiety with someone is one thing. Another very important thing is to learn how to breath. I have tried several different methods of breathing exercises and some I use for one thing and others I've found works better for other things. Only way to find out is to try it out.
I can get these panic attacks when I go in to town and there is too much traffic. Suddenly I feel the urge to get out of the lane I'm in so I can get out of the car. I get naseua and my breathing get shallow. Taking a deep breath from the lower abdomen in thrue the nose and out thrue the mouth. I coun't my breaths because that helps me get in a calm state without loosing focus on the traffic around me. Here I must state that I have never had a severe panic attack while driving and that I NEVER drive anywhere if I'm having a bad day.
I also calm myself by saying things like, you are safe, this will pass, just keep doing these breathings and you'll be fine again. Any affirmation that fits that moment is great.

Pedram suggest that you ask yourself some questions about these anxious states, like: What does it feel like? Is it warm or cold? Where do I feel it in my body?
Good questions, but not an exercise I want to do so late in the evening. I have tried working with my anxieties and have come to some solutions that I keep to if they occour. It is long between these insedences now, so I may not have gotten to the root of the problems, but the breathing exercises are working. And that is enough for me right here and now ;-)