My little place in space...

Haven't really had the head to make a lot of posts, but hopefully in the new year. Let's get this month over and done with! That's right, no Christmas spirit at all :/ This month used to be filled with traditions, but that has ended, I can't do that any more. My 2 daughters are all grown up, but I have 2 grandchildren now instead. For their sake we try and do a little bit Christmas stuff. But my girls have taken on the traditions them selves, so it's really up to them now, I think ;-) The picture above is from last year, no tree this year. Sadly I found out that it was a bit difficult to breath last year, after the tree got in the house. They are sprayed with something while they are small trees, mainly to avoid deers to nibble at them and ruin them before they are big enough to sell. My mother in law have the same problem and have bought a plastic tree. Looks like we have to do so too :( I don't like plastic trees, they look like those you see in the

Going on a trip in to town is a total drainer for the little energy I have. It's a 30-40 minutes drive by car, where I have to be alert of the trafic etc., then it's all those people suddenly surrounding me and the massive noise. On Wednesday I had promised my daughter to support her, while she attended a meeting, and I had a pretty good morning and was constantly thinking positive thoughts for her. The meeting went well, so she asked me how I was feeling and if I thought I could manage to go with her to get a Christmas gift. I was still doing good, so I said yes, and got to buy some gifts myself ;-) We got back home around 3.30pm, and actually had a nice day. 6 hours from I left home until I got back again. My head was so tired, but I didn't want to take a nap and ruin my new sleeping pattern. Went to bed early though but couldn't fall asleep :( See, that's one of the major things about having both stress and CFS. The body is in constant alert fase but at the sa

My dad would have turned 72 years today. Happy Birthday, Dad !! And on this date, 6 years ago, my father in law, passed away. My father followed him 4 months later. Then my neighbour has a birthday today too, and she turns 40 today....lol I don't normally dwell on dates for when loves ones has passed away, but I remember I called my dad on the way home from the hospital, after my father in law had passed, to tell him the sad news and at the same time, wish him a Happy Birthday. But I believe that we only borrow the body we have each life and that our soul lives on, so to me, they are not really gone :)

Understanding people with psychological problems isn't easy. I know my family and friends have had a hard time with that, but they still support me. I've never had anyone to give me that "kick in the butt" to get things done, but I believe that's because I'm so independent and needs to have control over things. Asking for help, has not been something I've practiced at lot. One of the major things I've had to learn, is being more selfish. I think that has been one of the hardest things I've have to do, being a giving person.

If you're on a diet you know there will be good days and bad days, ups and downs. So is the case when you are making several changes towards a better life too. One might say, that I've started with too many changes at once, but they somewhat adds together as a whole. Well maybe not the walking part, but I will give it a try anyway. I really need to get out more. The days that will be bad days, I will try not to get set back to scratch and give up on it all.

Some of the side effects from the meds is extreme dryness in mouth and nose and all my senses are working overtime. That means I'm very sensitive to smell and test. Topping that with nausea, eating isn't always easy. So I tend to skip my meals and just grab something in between. Not the healthiest way, I know. I have the sweetest husband who has taken over making dinner when he is home and he makes sure there are leftovers put in the freezer for me for when he's away for work every 2 weeks. I haven't been good at eating the meals, but now that is also going to change. So far I've had dinner EVERY day since he left about a week ago :)

Next step is daily exercises using the body’s own energy. Everything is surrounded by energy, even our own body, so why not use it to straighten up of the things that are not working to well. I recommend these 3 books combined: Energy Medicine, Energy Healing and I-Ching. I'm sure I'm not the only one who has a hard time filling my body with artificial made medicine, but I have accepted it for now, even though the side effects isn't good. At least it keeps my anxiety and stress down to a tolerable level. The holistic approach has been something I fully approve to use for a long time, but it has to feel right. So much bad stuff going on in that area, so trying to figure out in the jungle of natural meds, exercises etc. is not the easiest thing. But if one listens to the inner voice/feeling, then it can't be so bad. Some things are working for some and other things for someone else. We are not alike and our body needs different things. So for a start

It's not easy to get a normal sleeping pattern, when one is dealing with CFS (Chronicle Fatigue Syndrome). But so far it's going pretty good. I get to bed before midnight and up again around 8am. I'm awake several times during the night though, so only about 4-5 straight hours sleep. Still, things that happens and affects me during the day have a big influence for how well I sleep. But at least I've started :)

Well that headline is not quite right, cause the journey started a long time ago :) But my best friend surprised me with this gift. If you haven't seen this before, it's called a H'Optimist. They come in many colours and faces, and this one is the Smiley :) I had told my friend that I had one of these as a child and that I remembered it always made me smile, just looking at it. So, a few weeks back she surprised me with this one and there was a card along with it. She wrote: My dear friend Here's a little something from me to you. I hope that you will get better soon. I miss the person you once were and that I've had so many good times together with. That is why you get this little thing in hope that it will make you just a little bit happier!!! All I could say was, that I missed who I was back then too!!! But this made me take the last step towards the changes needed to be done. Not sure how many changes I need to make, but trying to tu